Shattered
by Lungor Sterling Lycien
Summary: We all know the movie version, where Christopher Wilde is a reknown artist with fame, money and a girlfriend... But what if it wasn't that way? What if he was born amongst a broken family, with no one to hold onto, alone? Would he be shattered?
1. Chapter 1

_Shattered…_

_Announcement_

Description:

Christopher Wilde is a world-wide known artist. He has a girlfriend, parents who are more carrying, fans, gory, money… All he had ever wanted… But what would have happened it wasn't that way? What if he wasn't known at all, alone, with careless parents and left with nothing? Would he still be the same? Or would he be shattered?

Rated:

Mostly T but sometimes M for some reasons Read FictionRatings for more information.

Genre:

Tragedy/Family

Warning:

No character in this story belongs to me. They all belong to their rightful owner. I just tried to write some kind of one-shot but longer, like a short novel. I wanted to try something new. Let me know what you think about it. I also wanted to experiment other sides for the characters, just like in this one. It may seem strange or even unrealistic for them… But as it is a site about 'fan' and 'fiction', why not try something different, something new? And it was interesting writing this story, creating a new atmosphere for this character, a new 'background'… I tried my best to keep some characteristics of his too. Except these warnings, I have nothing more to add. You can go on and… Enjoy!

Release date:

Immediately.

A story of:

_Lungor Sterling Zachary Camille Lycien_

Dedicated to:

A very special person, Garou, Tigre Blanc, Jon', l'Italien… And everyone because I think I might forget someone!

To my family.

And to all the readers who take time to come in this site and to read stories.


	2. Part 1

Part 1

_« The beautiful days of our life… »_


	3. Episode 1

_Shattered_

Chapter I: On a rough start…

Another boring day… Yay… It's cloudy, everything is grey… Except for my soul, which is dark black, and my body, which is purple… No, it's mostly my arm in fact… Yeah, it's just my arm… There's no friend I can play with, no one I could talk to, no one to see… I'm alone… And inside, buried deep inside my chest, I had a heavy pound which always tells me it's only the beginning… I'd always deny this. If it really was the beginning, then what's this thing called present I live in? Only one word can describe it, and it's not perfect at all, it doesn't mean anything… Hell… How can people say "What the hell" as they have never ever seen this place? I just laugh at them… I'd gladly let them take my place as I take theirs… Right now, I want to be anywhere but here…

I've always been an outcast, ever since I was born… It's just the way it's meant to be… Some people are born with fame, others with brains… I was born as an outcast. I can't do anything against it…

But I feel strange here…

Like somehow I just don't belong…

And this feeling's deep inside my skin… It burns me every day I see my parents…

They're not really ones in fact… They're just my executioners…

But it's just the way it was meant to be… It's my past, my present, and hopefully not, my future…

What can I do to live like any normal kid? Why aren't they like any other parents? Waking me up for school, making dinner, helping me with my homework, playing with me…? I'm their only child and still, it's like if I wasn't there… I'm invisible for them… I don't exist… I'm alone, on a Friday night, with no TV, no game… Just the window… And these parents playing with their kids… Outside, everything is so wonderful… But I can't even think about running away… What would it change, anyway? Nothing. But the grass over there just keeps getting greener and greener each day…

That's when I heard a loud crash…

Then other loud noises that made everyone outside looking at my house… A house which wasn't a home…

Some kids even hid behind their parents as it was getting louder and louder…

This is how it all begins… This is how it must ends…

I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare… Welcome to my life… Now, meet my family… Daniel, my mad father, and Sherry, my worn-out mother…

But I can't complain. They had a harder life before they 'decided' to have me. In fact, I was like an accident… Maybe I shouldn't have been born…

The couch. Always behind the couch. Under the table. The closet under the stairs. Three places to run. Three places to hide. Every time their voices would rise I would run to the closest sanctuary and thank God I was small enough to fit. But for how long 'till they could find me… And get me? Those voices that ran across each corner of the room seemed to reverberate off my very skin. Dad. He told me to call him Sir. Never Dad. He had to have the utmost respect from everyone… Maybe it was because of this that he got fired… Mom. She told me to call her Sherry. She was so pretty when she slept. She was so pretty when she was happy. Now, her body of twenty seven years was old. Tired from no sleep, breaking from fingertips pressed into her sides, and boiling with too hard of liquor for her fragile, porcelain outline. It was because of him…

After every uproar, every tear by her, and every empty bottle by him they would come looking. Her, happy to see him turn his malice towards me. Him, happy to turn his malice away from himself. I was the six year old pathetic coward. I was the six year old defenseless and useless kid they had never wanted… I was a six year old burden…

Sir, I would say.

My eyes would wander to Sherry with frightened curiosity.

What had I done?

What had I done to deserve this?

I called him sir. I called her Hannah.

They called me Christopher at school. Only when they would show up, dressed up and smiling, once or twice a school year…

They called me Christopher at church. As they wanted to show everyone how happy our family was… Dressed up, smiling, handsome and beautiful, saying some clever words… Speaking with the religious man about how love is the heart of a family…

But they were different… When no one's around and we're at house… Not home, because it isn't one…

They called me Monster at house.

Monster…

What's such a thing?

After black, they would confine me to my room. A tiny room with one window, where their words said minutes earlier would form long sentences and wrap around in a circle above my head like those music boxes loving mothers would clip to the sides of their infants cribs. I hated my room. I hated the dark. They knew it, too, and took pleasure in locking me in. Locking me in where they could get me. I was their toy… For I was a monster.

And I wasn't allowed to show up for dinner…

Because there wasn't even one for me. I only have one meal a day, at that's all… I know we're not poor, but he had to find money to buy his drinks that make him go mad… And that money came from my meals. Only one per day… But I'm still happy though, 'cause he wanted to reduce them to one per two days… But Sherry didn't agree…

And you, whom I don't know who you are, but who reads my mind right now: Please note, if you ever were a six year old child, remember what it was like to lay in bed and imagine that loud heartbeat pulsing thick from underneath your mattress. Remember that hand that hovered over your face once you've closed your eyes. Remember that loud breathing that resided around your open window. The creatures. That white little girl that crawled towards you in the night, hair hanging around the neck, fingers outstretched to a child, it is horrid. To an adult, it is a memory that most barely ever remembers… And you, how would react as a kid?


	4. Part 2

Part 2

_« 20 years later… »_


	5. Episode 2

_Shattered_

Chapter II: This is how it all ends…

Twenty years later.

What a sentence…

It feels like if it was still yesterday…

When I graduated in High School, and with an incredible chance 'cause I was far from having average notes… I still don't know how I got it… Anyway, after graduation, I left Sir and Sherry.

To run away from them.

Far away…

So I settled in California. Somewhere near Fresno. But as I needed money to pay bills, I had no other choice than trying to get a job. I tried but I couldn't find anything with just my diploma… So I went back to school… I went to college. My first year was strange. I knew no one, no one wanted to get to know me and the teachers weren't so friendly anymore… They would just come, say what they had to say, finish their lessons, and go back somewhere…

I was lost.

I was the strange boy who came straight from Wyoming.

I was alone.

But it didn't bother me much, as they ignored me and at least, I was free. More free than I ever were… But some would look at me with strange looks. I was quite thin, blond with bright blue eyes, and pale. I know what they were thinking about me. I wasn't normal. I wasn't like any of them.

They were right.

I'm not like them. And I don't want to.

Loneliness became my friend… And my shadow was always the only one who wasn't afraid to stay beside me. I needed no one else. But still, I don't know how or why, but somehow, I had a pang in my heart…

I think that I miss them…

I miss Sir and Sherry…

I would wonder how they were doing, how it was going for them…

But what's the use? I ran away from them… I didn't want them to chain me back. I didn't want them to cage me once again. I'm not the scarred little boy I used to be anymore. I'm not… I changed, for sure.

I'm rather the scary one than the scarred one…

But just for one main reason that no one understand. And that no one try to understand.

Could you guess what that reason is?

If you do, that's because you're somehow like me. And don't deny it… Don't hide your past, 'cause it'll find you and burn you… You'll understand later… When it'll be time…

I didn't understand love. I didn't understand human connection. I only understood the weather: constantly changing. I understood change. I didn't understand safety, or any emotion, be it love, or hate, that could be unconditional.

I was at my second year of college. I was striving to be a writer. I didn't trust the crowds. I would go to my apartment, sit at my small desk I had gotten at a garage sale, and stay there for hours with my books, my papers, and a bottle of brandy. I needed nothing more. It was all enough for me. I was only asking for peace. Then the day would end, and I'd get ready for the next.

I slept with the lights on.

Always.

'Cause even if I've been there for almost two years, the monsters from house have followed me. They were still hiding in the closet, behind the door, or even under my bed. I could heard them at night, whistling and whispering like snakes…

I didn't want many things, but every once in a while, I hate to admit, I would want to feel that popular emotion I had read about in so many books: love. I was scared to administer it myself. I was scared to feel for another person.

Plus, no human can be trusted.

Never.

We are all mean to denial, hate, anger and rage…

So things happened.

On the walk to my apartment I saw a girl in a red sweater. I don't know why, but just by looking at her, even though her back was facing, I felt strange. Terribly strange. It wasn't my normal state. My brain was frozen. My body was on fire. Without thinking, it ran towards her. And before I could blink, I pardoned her and asked her if she knew were Rebecca Street was. She looked at me in a funny way, paused, and turned her back to me. I said this without thinking. I don't even know if such a street exists. Then, it's like a black hole. I just remember parts of what happened… My hands ran to her shoulders, my lips to her neck. Hard fingers, hard hands. Her soft hair, thin ankles.

Before I could breathe, she had disappeared. Well, I wasn't in the same place. Seems like I had finished.

I must have run off, leaving the crying brunette with her violet bruises left in patches under her sweater and skirt. Like souvenirs. Like a nightmare.

Now, I remember…

That same feeling, that same scene…

I had been born of glass but now I only felt apathy. No regrets, but still, that hard human pain that is there when you know you have done a terrible trespass.

But the worst is that nothing can make it go away.

It's like a voice in your head that keeps reminding you of how bad you were…

How a monster you were…

I went back to my apartment. I turned all the lights on and opened the window. I needed air. I couldn't breathe right. The night was calm and beautiful. The wind brought in glow flies by the dozen. They did not bother me like they did to most locals here. They brought light and company and I loved them with all my heart. With all my heart. I feel strange.

Suddenly, the whole world was different…

My desires were their nightmares…

So I truly was a monster…

A monster…

I broke the lamps and poured the liquid into the bath tub. Small shards of porcelain glass managed to mix in with the water as well, that was now pouring from the faucet. I added the remaining kerosene I kept under my sink and by my desk which I had used as a denaturant for my alcohol.

I wasn't blind anymore, for I have opened my eyes.

A denaturant for alcohol…

Maybe it would have the same effect on me...

_Don't hide your past 'cause it'll find you, burn you…_


End file.
